It is deeply ironic, considering the thoughts that you have put forth, that these thoughts are so close to recent thoughts of mine. Or perhaps it demonstrates that what we (general) must look for is not an immediate sharing, a simultaneous thought process, but a similitude that allows for vast differences in thoughts and in the time of their occurence to one another. You're right, of course, we humans are fundamentally othered from our cohorts, but accepting that fact, we might go on to recognize the repercussions of our patterns, and how our thoughts ripple into in others' patterns, and maybe that's where things get interesting. Because others give us reflections of ourselves, even though they ARE not reflections of ourselves.
I cannot deny others the right to look for reflections of their behavior in my own (and I know that's not what you meant by 'reflection', but bear w/me for a moment). The point of doing so is not to own these behaviors, to claim them, as I almost did above, as "my thoughts", "my style", "my behavior". There is always going to be that distance. But it's not a void, it's not a static distance, it's a creative distance. And the wonderful thing about other minds is the potential for figuring out what's happening in that distance, and what makes it possible for that distance to become virtually nonexistent (or empty, if you prefer) in places, and untranslateably far (full) in others. Some of these questions have simple answers (language, psychology), but I don't think the answers are that fully formed.
And on a more concrete level, you have to be willing to tell someone else everything, EVERYTHING, in order to fully utilize your experimental space, and your capacity for reflection. If you're not, then you've fallen into the trap that much of western science, esp. medicine, finds itself in: you have reduced the variables in the experiment, and by doing so, reduced the usefulness of the experiment.
Now that I've put my own obsession with science in between our similarly- existential-crisis-ing minds (souls?), I'll go.